Just finished watching "Glory". A movie actually plotted upon 1863 background, showing the disparities against the colored people. I found, this was the perfect time to watch this movie after watching the scene where denzel washington very sarcastically answered upon a question, what do you do? He answered, I,m running for president. Everybody laughed & he even sarcastically added, " I won though". Watching this scene, I wondered though if they remembered shooting this moment, when Barack Obama was declared the president elect. I definitely can say that at that moment, i mean when the movie was shot, nobody ever would even have thought that, this is gonna be a reality some day. Or, may be they are very very & very brilliant actor.
After couple of minutes the year is going to be over. So, many thoughts are humming in my mind, but what should i write about? .................well, i give up...........so many things, which i can't finish writing in one post. One electrifying moment though I can mention, when Barack Obama was declared as president elect & the speech afterward. I think the movie Glory even carried more value to me because of that moment.
How I'm gonna say good bye to 2008, or welcome 2009? In fact, I had so many downs in 2008, ii can't wait to say good bye to 2008. But, can 2009 bring me all the things I want in life. Who knows, but can't wait to look forward to it.
Like many of you I have made a lot of resolutions for new year, the biggest of all, I want to love myself more than anything else. That myself include me, my family..........& have the good time rolling for my people, make my world filled with happiness with my family.
Wish all of you A Happy New Year.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Monday, December 29, 2008
is loosing weight that tough..................
I can't still belief I couldn't stick to my diet plan even for a day. It has been so many months I'm trying to loose weight, I've planned so many diet plan, with some of the plan I've been able to loose some weight previously, but now a days it seems harder & harder to follow any kind of plan? What's happening to me. for couple of days I'm trying to research my own self, why I'm coming so empty in my will power? Is it because so many things I've been through for last couple of years or is it because I've seen that life didn't work as I wanted it to work for me, although i did everything in my power to reach my goal, or, this is the way life is supposed to be?
Currently I'm almost 30 pounds overweight, to loose 2pounds per week, I am supposed to eat 1200 cal/day. I'm trying to incorporate organic & fiber in my diet, some metabolism boosting foods, grape fruit, an some natural diuretic everyday. I'm still trying to figure out the perfect harmony so that I don't feel like I'm kind of stressing myself for anything. I've to learn to do some vigorous physical activity everyday. So, with this fundamental plan in my mind, i had almost a perfect day, but............again I cheated. I had 4 chocolate dipped oreo cookies. Unnecessary 280 calories................i feel so awful now.
Here's what I had today:
Breakfast:
1) Raisin bran cereal- 1 serving-180 cal.
2) 1 Strawberry with cereal-4 cal.
Mid morning Snack:
1 cup of egg drop soup-76 cals.
Lunch:
egg salad sandwich-350 cals. I used multi grain bread with flax seed from whole food, so i managed to incorporate a very essential ingredient in my diet just by using the bread. I also used egg from whole food, which is cage free & omega 3 fatty acid rich. I also had some cucumber which is a very good food to loose weight.
Evening snacks:
4 oreo fudge cookies-280 ( here I got some unnecessary cals, which I could have avoided easily.
Dinner:
2 rotis-140 cals
1 cup of cauliflower cooked indian style-unknown cals.
half a cup of mixed dal(lentils)-unknown cals.
Because 2 of the dish have unknown cals i donno whether I made it or not............hopefully I did.
From tomorrow, i will try to be little tougher on my plan, don't know the cal count, don't eat it.
One big thing I'm gonna incorporate in my life style, Tennis, A good n fun filled way to do some daily calorie burning activity.
Hopefully I will be able to reach my goal this time, so, next Sunday is the may day, I'm 150 pounds now, i will let you know if i weigh 148 pounds!!!!!!!!!!!
Currently I'm almost 30 pounds overweight, to loose 2pounds per week, I am supposed to eat 1200 cal/day. I'm trying to incorporate organic & fiber in my diet, some metabolism boosting foods, grape fruit, an some natural diuretic everyday. I'm still trying to figure out the perfect harmony so that I don't feel like I'm kind of stressing myself for anything. I've to learn to do some vigorous physical activity everyday. So, with this fundamental plan in my mind, i had almost a perfect day, but............again I cheated. I had 4 chocolate dipped oreo cookies. Unnecessary 280 calories................i feel so awful now.
Here's what I had today:
Breakfast:
1) Raisin bran cereal- 1 serving-180 cal.
2) 1 Strawberry with cereal-4 cal.
Mid morning Snack:
1 cup of egg drop soup-76 cals.
Lunch:
egg salad sandwich-350 cals. I used multi grain bread with flax seed from whole food, so i managed to incorporate a very essential ingredient in my diet just by using the bread. I also used egg from whole food, which is cage free & omega 3 fatty acid rich. I also had some cucumber which is a very good food to loose weight.
Evening snacks:
4 oreo fudge cookies-280 ( here I got some unnecessary cals, which I could have avoided easily.
Dinner:
2 rotis-140 cals
1 cup of cauliflower cooked indian style-unknown cals.
half a cup of mixed dal(lentils)-unknown cals.
Because 2 of the dish have unknown cals i donno whether I made it or not............hopefully I did.
From tomorrow, i will try to be little tougher on my plan, don't know the cal count, don't eat it.
One big thing I'm gonna incorporate in my life style, Tennis, A good n fun filled way to do some daily calorie burning activity.
Hopefully I will be able to reach my goal this time, so, next Sunday is the may day, I'm 150 pounds now, i will let you know if i weigh 148 pounds!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, December 28, 2008
A lazy Sunday...............................
Today is the first Sunday after Christmas. Can I call it a lazy day? Well, may be for so many people in the world, the amount of activity I had today, will be quite a lazy day. For me, if not very active; I definitely can call it, a sort of active day.
one thing I have noticed in last few years, not only people ages physically, but they do mentally too. I mean, all of us know that, but when you notice the change in yourself, it's quite a bit shocking, unexpected, unbelievable..........or, may be some time questionable too.
The reason I wanted to bring this up is, i always felt that, I have a very strong will power, I just had to wish it from core of my heart, I always made it possible, I always reached the goal that I set in my life. As I am getting older I think my will power is aging too. but, if it does so, with whom, my body or my soul, or do you think with the brain. It has been couple of years I am putting weight. For some period of time it was just the upper limit of normal range. I don't know, when I started falling in the overweight category. Good Lord I haven't made it to the obese range yet, but I can see the tombstone, it is very reachable. i am fighting for this weight for last couple of years, but hard enough? I would say last couple of months. Where is my will power? I can't find it any where. The perfect weight seems so unreachable. I feel so weak, so left alone without my will power. So, that is the activity I had, today. Have started walking in the morning. Drink plenty of water, eat a lot of fruits & vegetable & watch everything I eat. Today is the first day ...............I don't know if I can get my will power back? If I can reach my goal weight, I will say lost will power is not like aging, once gone, gone with the wind, you can get it back like the lost love. Then i would say, it belongs to the soul. If I can not get my will power back, can I say that it belongs to our physical self, once gone ..........gone for ever. Let's see.............!!!!!!!!!
one thing I have noticed in last few years, not only people ages physically, but they do mentally too. I mean, all of us know that, but when you notice the change in yourself, it's quite a bit shocking, unexpected, unbelievable..........or, may be some time questionable too.
The reason I wanted to bring this up is, i always felt that, I have a very strong will power, I just had to wish it from core of my heart, I always made it possible, I always reached the goal that I set in my life. As I am getting older I think my will power is aging too. but, if it does so, with whom, my body or my soul, or do you think with the brain. It has been couple of years I am putting weight. For some period of time it was just the upper limit of normal range. I don't know, when I started falling in the overweight category. Good Lord I haven't made it to the obese range yet, but I can see the tombstone, it is very reachable. i am fighting for this weight for last couple of years, but hard enough? I would say last couple of months. Where is my will power? I can't find it any where. The perfect weight seems so unreachable. I feel so weak, so left alone without my will power. So, that is the activity I had, today. Have started walking in the morning. Drink plenty of water, eat a lot of fruits & vegetable & watch everything I eat. Today is the first day ...............I don't know if I can get my will power back? If I can reach my goal weight, I will say lost will power is not like aging, once gone, gone with the wind, you can get it back like the lost love. Then i would say, it belongs to the soul. If I can not get my will power back, can I say that it belongs to our physical self, once gone ..........gone for ever. Let's see.............!!!!!!!!!
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Intro....................I
This is the beginning of my Blogging, I don't know yet where to start. I'm thinking starting from the child hood, as early as I can remember. let's take a walk down the memory lane.....................
I think nobody has a perfect childhood, but I guess, I had a near perfect one. We had a beautiful house in the corner of the Dhanmondi road no 3. A beautiful big house; with a very big verandah.Now a days we even can't get a room that big in our houses. The floor of that verandah still amazes me. It was a black n white marbeling, looked like whole floor was carpeted. The green mosaic in other rooms, haven't seen any where else.
We had two big spaces perfect for gardening. The one in the back, very often used to be overgrown by diffrent trees. A kamini, kathal chapa, morich joba, fazli aam, kagoji lebu made the space rich. A wooden door was on that side, the gateway. I still remember the day Salu n Joki went up the tree to fetch the mango n some ones lungi fell off!!!!!!!!!!!!I can't remember whose, though.
Any way other side of the free space had another big mango tree, A brick wall separating "pasher basha" from ours. Mango of this tree was called gopal bhog, I guess. We also had a 'sheuli gach' on that side, that part used to be covered with so many "chengas". those little creatures made that side of the garden very scary to me. Waking up in the morning n collecting the sheulis, dropped beneath the tree over night ,was one of my favourite "things to do". Talking about things to do, I just realized how drastically this 'things to do list' changes, now a days my things to do list is full of householdworks, as I am taking a break from my professional life for a while. I felt, I was just riding on a roller coaster for couple of years. Taking this time off was a real necessity. I am sort of enjoying my housewife life, but.........., some where my own self is missing. I can only find my ownself in my professional life, meeting my patients, my daily clinic, arguing with the Dx n Ddx, making the right choice for my patients, those r my passions. Research is my another passion, I call it -my baby. Well,what should I call my cooking skill then? may be, a passion I enjoy doing when my life is full filled, or a escape when my life is empty, both way this is another thing I like to do n I do it very well.
Ok, let me turn my thread back to the past again.............we also had a beautiful chad, Terrace. Pasher bashar, golap jum gach, amader bashar aam gach, chatim gach n krishnochura gach made our terrace almost a botanical garden. After a shower in the morning or noon, ammu used to massage olive oil n send us to the terrace in the winter, never felt the comfort of that sunshine again in life. We used to play fighting with the krishnochura buds..........I'm not gonna explain the whole game, that was kind of silly. There was a tin shed above the stair case that was the place where I used to do all my home works. Sometime in the beginning of the winter season, Ammu used to put the red coloured lep (comforter) to make it warm n fresh under the sun, n I used to sit on those leps to do my homeworks. Still remember stealing the spiced mangoes that were kept under the sun to be dried.
Surprisingly enough, we had a 'koltola" too. Koltola just reminded me of shahida bua. Just pictured shaihida bua washing cloth................funny, very funny. There were some slits in the wall that separated this portion of our house from "Zakia Kutir". We could pass our fingers very easily n pick some white lily from their garden..........silly! There was a white Rongon on that side, which was always covered with white flowers & a mesmorizing smell always was there in the gentle breeze. Wan't there a very big Kochu gach on that side n a big jackfruit tree too, some one help me here.....it can't be that I'm just imagining a big kochu gach out of so many plants on earth. If I put my imagination into work, I will picture a chapa phul gach there. Will the smell be more enchanting then, who knows? I wish I had imaginary smellavision where i could painted my dhanmondi 3 no house once again in 4D, which includes the smell. I believe there was also a Jackfruit tree, full of caterpillars (chengas) in between the window of our room n the Garage.
One biggest fun I have missed mentioning is the Dolna, we use to hang over the mango tree.........so much fun. Those r the things made my child hood near perfect, along with so many other things.
I think, I'm still spinning within the 360 degree view of the place where I had my childhood, making memories,
please stay with me while I walk down the memory lane, I am sure their will be moments I will need you to hold my hands, lend a shoulder to cry, or sing with me the happy song. Will you?
I think nobody has a perfect childhood, but I guess, I had a near perfect one. We had a beautiful house in the corner of the Dhanmondi road no 3. A beautiful big house; with a very big verandah.Now a days we even can't get a room that big in our houses. The floor of that verandah still amazes me. It was a black n white marbeling, looked like whole floor was carpeted. The green mosaic in other rooms, haven't seen any where else.
We had two big spaces perfect for gardening. The one in the back, very often used to be overgrown by diffrent trees. A kamini, kathal chapa, morich joba, fazli aam, kagoji lebu made the space rich. A wooden door was on that side, the gateway. I still remember the day Salu n Joki went up the tree to fetch the mango n some ones lungi fell off!!!!!!!!!!!!I can't remember whose, though.
Any way other side of the free space had another big mango tree, A brick wall separating "pasher basha" from ours. Mango of this tree was called gopal bhog, I guess. We also had a 'sheuli gach' on that side, that part used to be covered with so many "chengas". those little creatures made that side of the garden very scary to me. Waking up in the morning n collecting the sheulis, dropped beneath the tree over night ,was one of my favourite "things to do". Talking about things to do, I just realized how drastically this 'things to do list' changes, now a days my things to do list is full of householdworks, as I am taking a break from my professional life for a while. I felt, I was just riding on a roller coaster for couple of years. Taking this time off was a real necessity. I am sort of enjoying my housewife life, but.........., some where my own self is missing. I can only find my ownself in my professional life, meeting my patients, my daily clinic, arguing with the Dx n Ddx, making the right choice for my patients, those r my passions. Research is my another passion, I call it -my baby. Well,what should I call my cooking skill then? may be, a passion I enjoy doing when my life is full filled, or a escape when my life is empty, both way this is another thing I like to do n I do it very well.
Ok, let me turn my thread back to the past again.............we also had a beautiful chad, Terrace. Pasher bashar, golap jum gach, amader bashar aam gach, chatim gach n krishnochura gach made our terrace almost a botanical garden. After a shower in the morning or noon, ammu used to massage olive oil n send us to the terrace in the winter, never felt the comfort of that sunshine again in life. We used to play fighting with the krishnochura buds..........I'm not gonna explain the whole game, that was kind of silly. There was a tin shed above the stair case that was the place where I used to do all my home works. Sometime in the beginning of the winter season, Ammu used to put the red coloured lep (comforter) to make it warm n fresh under the sun, n I used to sit on those leps to do my homeworks. Still remember stealing the spiced mangoes that were kept under the sun to be dried.
Surprisingly enough, we had a 'koltola" too. Koltola just reminded me of shahida bua. Just pictured shaihida bua washing cloth................funny, very funny. There were some slits in the wall that separated this portion of our house from "Zakia Kutir". We could pass our fingers very easily n pick some white lily from their garden..........silly! There was a white Rongon on that side, which was always covered with white flowers & a mesmorizing smell always was there in the gentle breeze. Wan't there a very big Kochu gach on that side n a big jackfruit tree too, some one help me here.....it can't be that I'm just imagining a big kochu gach out of so many plants on earth. If I put my imagination into work, I will picture a chapa phul gach there. Will the smell be more enchanting then, who knows? I wish I had imaginary smellavision where i could painted my dhanmondi 3 no house once again in 4D, which includes the smell. I believe there was also a Jackfruit tree, full of caterpillars (chengas) in between the window of our room n the Garage.
One biggest fun I have missed mentioning is the Dolna, we use to hang over the mango tree.........so much fun. Those r the things made my child hood near perfect, along with so many other things.
I think, I'm still spinning within the 360 degree view of the place where I had my childhood, making memories,
please stay with me while I walk down the memory lane, I am sure their will be moments I will need you to hold my hands, lend a shoulder to cry, or sing with me the happy song. Will you?
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